The Dissemination of Thought

Just because it's in print doesn't mean it's intelligent…

Archive for the ‘Articles for other blogs’ Category

Why your privacy will be replaced with t-shirts and belt buckles

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It’s about time I pulled my finger out and wrote another guest piece for Magnificent Nose. This post looks at privacy, and how we aren’t helping ourselves by sharing every aspect of our lives publicly, either via social networking or by failing to adjust our volume knobs when we’re out and about.

"So, it's definitely herpes? Can you speak up? Yes, I'm on the bus right now." Source of original photograph: sohaveyouevernoticed.blogspot.com

Here’s a snippet from Magnificent Nose:

Social networking has conditioned us to share absolutely everything about our lives; it’s as if we’ve adopted a policy of “if it’s happening, it’s worth announcing”. We’re so absorbed in our own self-importance that it doesn’t occur to us the people at the adjacent table have no interest in being subjected to a vivid description of our rash and the doctor’s prognosis. We don’t seem to care when there is a privacy breach because of our own lax stupidity, but if someone found out about our rash because of loose lips at the medical centre, we’d be livid. Isn’t that just the slightest bit hypocritical?

To continue reading “There’s nothing private about full disclosure couture”, you should point your cursor here and click the left mouse button.

See, the t-shirt idea works. Now you can cross diseases off the list of things that may be wrong with him. Source: vegasarrowstore.com

Since “There’s nothing private about full disclosure couture” is a thinly-veiled jab at social networking, it would be remiss of me not to use it as a hypocritical segue to plug The Dissemination of Thought Facebook page. Magnificent Nose also has a holiday house in Zuckerbergland, and you can find it by clicking right here.

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A polished prison and 50-word sagas: blogging from the BlackBerry

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“Transformation”, my first attempt at a mini saga, has been published today on 50 Items or Less.

A mini saga is a story that has exactly 50 words. It doesn’t matter whether it’s a work of fiction or non-fiction, the key is to incorporate a beginning, middle and ending into the 50-word limit. It’s harder than it sounds, especially if you genuinely wish to fully engage your reader before the fiftieth word.

Personally, I love the way the succinct nakedness of the mini saga causes each reader to interpret its meaning subjectively. There’s no room for elaboration or plot development, so readers tend to fill in any blanks with images and feelings drawn from their own experiences and expectations.

A great mini saga should, in my opinion, make the reader continually reassess the words he or she is absorbing and question their meaning. It should leave them wanting full comprehension, even if that means rereading the piece a dozen times or asking the author for clarification; if someone has “had enough” of one of my mini sagas after reading it once, I’ve failed to engage them. I’ve failed to make my 50 words count.

“Transformation” can be found on 50 Items or Less by clicking here.

Posted with WordPress for BlackBerry on my BlackBerry Bold 9700

Written by disseminatedthought

February 22, 2012 at 16:20

Facebook friends and the end: will our obsession with social media make face-to-face contact a memory?

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Today’s post is another guest piece on Magnificent Nose, this time about a Facebook application that allows you to update your status after you have become earthworm food.

Source: technmarketing.com

It’s simple: I tempt you with a few lines that make absolutely no sense, and then you click here to zip across (is that the technological term?) to Magnificent Nose to read the full article.

The tagline on the “If I die” application’s website asks, “What happens to your Facebook profile if you die?” I always assumed that when I died, I’d be too busy being dead to consider what the world was doing without my status updates. While still in the land of the living, wouldn’t the time invested in planning our final broadcast be better spent rekindling relationships that have lapsed because of our fixation on maintaining hundreds of virtual friendships?

If you were disobedient and didn’t click on the above link like you were told to, try this one to read “The Final Check-In”.

While we are on the subject of social networking, remember to check out The Dissemination of Thought Facebook page. For every person that likes it, a unicycle-riding circus bear will be sent a cheque for $2* and a bag of Doritos.

* Author’s note: cheques will not be honoured. What the hell do bears need money for?

Upon escaping from the circus, Yogi pedalled like fuck and headed for the hills. Source: iphonetoolbox.com

I tweet, therefore I am…as boring as hell: lobotomising the world, one update at a time

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Even as I write this, I’m accosted by another ridiculously pointless, whiny status update from one of my Facebook friends. Fuck me. “[Name removed to protect their stupidity] is tired after a long day.” Really? Thanks for sharing that nugget of genius, but I’m now dumber for knowing you.

Does this really warrant a status update? Source: toast.anu.edu.au

Why does everyone, especially since social networking became idiot-proof, assume that the world wants to know what they’re doing 24 hours a day? Just because you can, doesn’t necessarily mean that you should.

Source: blog.virginaustralia.com

I’ve written another article on Magnificent Nose entitled “Facebook and Twitter don’t care that you’re boring, but your status updates have the rest of us snoring: a Tahitian lime epiphany”, that examines the phenomenon of individuals who feel compelled to share every boring, mind-numbing detail about their feelings and dietary habits with the social networking universe.

Partly because of the instant audience that social networking platforms provide, we have become a society that is under the delusion that the world deserves–and apparently, wants–to know every detail about our lives. People seem to think that they are more exciting than they actually are, and the result is that they are sharing every boring, painfully nauseating facet of their monochromatically dull lives.

Here’s the sad reality: You are boring.

I came in pretty late on the whole Facebook tidal wave, somewhere around 2009, but at that stage people only posted interesting stuff. A quote. A song. Something amusing that had happened to them during the day. Jump forward 3 years, and with the advent of Twitter and the myriad of other social media platforms, every man and their dog (literally: pets have Facebook profiles now) thinks that they have a licence to post drivel. Boring drivel. Don’t believe me? It’s reached a point where we can categorise the inane rants into four specific types.

You know how it works. I tease you a little bit here, don’t give you my real phone number, and then force you to jump across to Magnificent Nose to read the full piece and achieve blogging fulfilment. Don’t pretend you didn’t know I was an asshole before you began following me.

“Whingy McBoring is angry at the weather.” Didn’t you get the memo? Clouds don’t have Wi-Fi. Source: lonelyplanet.com

If you missed the obvious link above, you can continue reading “Facebook and Twitter don’t care that you’re boring, but your status updates have the rest of us snoring: a Tahitian lime epiphany” here. Enjoy.

Author’s note: remember to check out (and like) The Dissemination of Thought Facebook page. Come on, the more the merrier. I guarantee there won’t be any updates about me boiling an egg, nor will there be any vehement rants aimed at microwaves, toothbrushes or any other inanimate objects.

Source: t3.com.au

Chivalry, a dirty nappy and the peak hour traveller that wasn’t happy

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I’ve guest written a piece today for Magnificent Nose entitled ”Chivalry and the Shifting Goal Posts”. Funnily enough, it’s about chivalry, but it’s also got an angry woman on a bus and a sentence that concludes with “makeshift nappy for an infant with explosive diarrhoea.” How can you not be intrigued?

To tempt you with the toxic fruit of my mind, here’s a little glimpse behind the curtain:

No one wants to watch the early morning news story about an overnight murder and have to ask themselves, “Was that dismembered corpse floating in the river my date?” Gentlemen, nothing makes a more negative impression on your potential bed mate than her getting mugged while walking home alone, purely because you were too lazy to accompany her for the 600m journey back to her apartment. The only thing that will make this worse is if you refused to do so because the pub was still serving $5 pints, or because you wanted to see what happened in extra time. Should you do so, the only time you will ever see her again is if you catch her slashing your tyres or setting fire to your mailbox.

I know you want to keep reading this article, so click here to jump across to Magnificent Nose; if you don’t, they will beat me and I’ll cry like a 2-year-old girl. You really, really don’t want to see me crying and throwing a hissy fit.

Source of original photograph: honeyhype.com