The Dissemination of Thought

Just because it's in print doesn't mean it's intelligent…

Man-whores, smut and Jabba the Hutt

with 11 comments

Analysing the phrases that people enter into search engines to end up at The Dissemination of Thought never ceases to be a constant source of amusement to me. The void between what I deduce they were hoping to find and where they actually landed is a chasm that has to cause them significant disappointment and confusion while they reassess their deviant perquisition. Was the person who searched for “boobs in a puppet stage” dismayed when they failed to find hardcore marionette sex? Did the individual who googled “germain greer strippers” want to locate any gentlemen’s clubs owned by the feminist?

As a tribute to those who inadvertently discovered TDoT, I’m going to examine four search terms that have made me laugh.

Author’s note: what you see below is exactly what people typed into their search engines to end up at TDoT. Don’t whinge and bitch about the spelling and grammatical errors.

“miss piggy sex tape”

This would be the logical next step after the sex tape leak. Source: verybadfrog.com

Come on people, bestiality is just wrong. When you get to the point of seeking out puppet pornography, it’s time to question what you’re doing with your life. What’s next? Searches for SpongeBob SquarePants banging one of the Powerpuff Girls?

I can’t believe I found this photo. Actually, I can’t believe I searched for it in the first place. Source: funnyordie.com

gigolo

I bet they were disappointed when their search for a man-whore landed them here. That said, if they still visit The Dissemination of Thought, they should definitely drop me a line: I’m willing to consider all proposals, except those of marriage.

badwrap sex

I’m not sure about this one. Perhaps they were searching for advice on how to remove oneself from the confines of poorly wrapped cling film after an intimate encounter. Hey, stranger things have happened.

liberal david barker jabba the hut

When I alluded to the similarity between wannabe politician David Barker and a Star Wars villain in God: Liberal Candidate for Chifely, I assumed that I was the only one whose sense of humour was warped enough to make the connection. To my surprise, the search terms tracker shows that several people were linking the mental image of everyone’s favourite Tatooine resident with the views of a narrow-minded religious bigot when the googled. Further adding to my surprise was the fact that I never received any hate mail or notifications of pending legal action for the aforementioned piece.

Jabba considers the opinion of one of his constituents. Source: starwars.com

What are the most perverse search terms that people have used to find you in the blogosphere?

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11 Responses

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  1. Although this is disturbing as to why you actually pressed the buttons that resulted in those search results…BUT this is very amusing. I now have an image in my head of two dolls having a sex session which is disturbing in a big way…..THANKS LOL.
    Yet again another well crafted blog enjoyable to read

    Cameron Keane

    December 15, 2011 at 10:33

  2. Dude, I can’t unlock my blogosphere. How do you find the search terms? What a great reason to release any deranged humor that comes to mind!

    Solomon

    December 15, 2011 at 12:26

    • If you check out your site statistics, there’s a part on the main page that shows search terms. It’s truly disturbing to see some of the stuff that has led people to your blog.

      disseminatedthought

      December 15, 2011 at 12:32

  3. Oh dearz. I am disturbed LOL :P

    missmaribelmaeve

    December 15, 2011 at 22:41

  4. ‘Milhouse rash’ was used to find me….. was there an episode of The Simpsons I missed? Or a new venereal disease I hadn’t heard of? Either way I didn’t mention any rashes in my blog, nor do I have any for that matter.

    byroisinhealy

    December 16, 2011 at 01:10

  5. Fantastic post idea!!

    Some of the most recent I’ve gotten include “weird al”, “saganaki has closed?”and, just today, “time dragon clock wicked”. Not as profane as yours, but amusing nonetheless.

    Unrelenting Amee

    February 5, 2012 at 08:27

    • There are some truly terrifying search terms floating around. In the last 7 days, someone found my blog by searching with the phrase “giant ice cream dick.” WTF?

      Thank you for your contribution to the discussion, and welcome to The Dissemination of Thought, your home of disconcerting Google searches.

      disseminatedthought

      February 5, 2012 at 17:42

      • Truly, I hope you are impressed. I don’t think any of those implications are bad for your blog! I hope these posts become a regular feature. ;) Thanks for the welcome, and pondering the untapped blog-worthiness of disconcerting Google searches.

        Unrelenting Amee

        February 7, 2012 at 19:27


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